Every one has their calling..what's yours?
I was speaking to a friend last night and the topic of picking the right career came up. It was an interesting conversation because of the disparity in our approach to aspirations/careers/goals. I am Durga - The contemporary corporate slave shackled with gold chains in an unfulfilling job with the ability to afford the luxuries coveted by many. She is R - A world traveler with ambitions to change the world and the ability to make a difference in under privileged lives with her actions. Yet on the flip side, she’s living in debt and always financially planning next moves. So the topic of answering your calling came up. So here’s the train of thought that followed our stirring conversation.
- Are you answering your calling?
- Are you doing something you truly want to do on a daily basis?
- Have you already answered your call but find that its way too over rated?
- Do you really know what you want to do?
- Are you doing what you imagined you would be doing when you were 5?
As a person of Indian decent I, like most of my “common heritage compadres”, have been brainwashed since birth about security. Security is synonymous to acquiring material wealth, marrying the right (A secure bride/groom of Indian decent will satisfy requirements) woman/man at a young age, saving for retirement and saving to brainwash (umm…educate) your children. So we were brought up with the common goal of being an engineer or a doctor and more recently in finance. Well the right order of importance to the Indian parent are – Doctor, Lawyer, Engineer, I-Banker/Trader, and Business Owner (usually hand me downs from the parent). This is what we learn from the day we are born till the day of accomplishment and if you become an engineer your parents tell you how they wished you would’ve been a doctor…so its def. a hard knock life.
Hence second generation or fully assimilated Indians such as me, respect the select few who choose to follow contemporary careers such as journalism, music, the arts, national security, etc. It shows a sense of an emancipated accomplishment, just like taking the red pill instead of the blue to escape the Matrix. But again we shower our kudos and picture us living our life’s through them by recognizing them as a part of our community. This is followed by regretting our inability to break the mold which is then followed by denial.
So what's the solution to this ineptitude? Quite Frankly, I’m still trying to find out. But its def. not the apathetic approach I am currently settling for. To solve any problem you must understand it better, therefore here are my answers to the questions posted above are:
- I’m not answering my call
- I'm not doing anything that makes me excited to wake up and go to work every day
- I don’t know what I really want to do because my minds distorted by the brain washing
- I’m def. not doing what I imagined I would be doing when I was 5 (Pri-minister of India..lol)
So I have understood my problem, yet no solutions. But here’s a positive spin on it - Hindu’s believe in re-incarnation…so may be I'll get a do-over in the next life :).
3 comments:
Although, our parents "brainwashed" us, to some extent you gotta believe they were in the words of Dave Chappelle "Keepin it real", and I don't think it went wrong in this case either. Because if you look at the generations of Indians that have left India, and gone to whichever westernized country, they've pretty much done pretty well. They've started their hotels, or become engineers. Now these may not seem like passionate pursuits, they are practical, and from a speculatively statistical standpoint successful.
I've seen entirely too many non-Indian kids who struggle through college because their parents couldn't afford to help them pay for college. On some level, I actually think that we might be spoiled as second generation Indians. I almost feel like our parents became engineers or gas-station owners because it paid the bills, and allowed them to allow their kids to follow their dreams. But I guess therein lies your question, what is your dream. I think the paradox is that we may want to pursue something in the liberal arts (for example become a singer), yet not disappoint our parents and the financial success they've had by creating something out of nothing. Its pretty twisted, and almost seems like a completely sick and twisted analogy to Freud's Oetipus Complex accept on a level of society as opposed to an individual.
I agree that Indian parents do have a heavy influence on what their children should do.. but you have to question what their intentions are. Could it be selfish intent? To prove to the world (and relatives ;-) ) that their children are successful. I don't see anything wrong with being a doctor.. but there are other ways to make use of one's creativity and intelligence to be successful in life.
Everyone has a calling.. and I think people should have relentless determination to find out just what their purpose in life is. By doing so, their true focus shouldn't be so much to earn money or fame.. but to genuinely figure out how their talents / creativity can benefit the world around them. That truly is the secret to happiness. Fame and fortune is fleeting.. but knowing that you made a positive difference in the lives of many provides a sense of joy that cannot be duplicated.. and if you're really good at that.. then fame and fortune is just an added bonus.. but shouldn't be seen as the goal.
Nevertheless, it's never too late to find your calling.. just have whole-hearted faith in yourself and go out and pursue it.
The point I was trying to get across was our own ineptitude to discover and pursue our dreams. Our parents have of course sacrificed a lot and want the best for us. Another point that I was trying to convey was that most of our upbringing has been targetted towards acquisition of material accolades not personal/spiritual discovery.
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